Room4Talk blog | Personal relationships in the digital age? Oh, God. Human first !

Personal relationships in the digital age? Oh, God. Human first !

08/01/2017

What is the first thing you do when you wake up?

Phones and social media have become an essential part of our everyday lives. Digitalization has had a huge impact on our lifestyle, whether we are aware of it or not. The point is we have become addicted to our phones as well as social apps like Facebook, Instagram and Snapchat and we don’t even realize it!

I hadn’t realized I was affected until someone asked me: “What is the first thing you do when you wake up?”. I was embarrassed to admit the answer: “I check my phone”. Apart from the fact that we waste an enormous amount of time checking how many people have “liked” our photos or stalking love interests on Instagram, we are losing out on so much more. And do you know what that is? REAL LIFE.

This addiction leads to dissatisfaction, impatience and even depression. An example? “OMG, I only had 30 likes on Facebook, where did I go wrong?”. The truth is simple: this is not your real life. People still love you, buddy, so don’t worry. But think about the long term effects of being exposed to this kind of dissatisfaction with yourself, which happens every time you fail or make a mistake.

We are also more impatient. A simple example? “Why hasn't he/she replied yet?”. If you have to wait 24 hours for a reply, that’s a big deal. You’d have killed yourself back in the 1800s when people had to wait at least 15 days to receive a letter – if the pigeon hadn’t died in the meantime! We subconsciously apply the same pattern to real life, especially in areas where it takes time to achieve satisfaction: love and work. Most of you know Tinder, the easiest way to have a fling with minimal effort. All you have to do is swipe left or right. No effort, no risk of failure, no real engagement at all. So, tell me, when the time comes, how will you be able to build a serious relationship? You don’t know. The same can be said for jobs, especially among young people who are not satisfied with their careers because they feel they are not important to the company or they’re not progressing. Come on, 3 months ago you were doing an internship! You’ve just started so be patient!

We can’t build relationships spontaneously but that’s exactly what we try and do on our phones.

Avoid the temptation and interact with real people: the more you practice it, the easier it will be to meet people when you’re least expecting it and strengthen the relationships you already have. I was forced to do that during my first internship abroad; I had no friends so I just had to take the initiative and break the ice. And do you know what? People will be glad of it because they feel lonely, too, and are afraid to be the ones to make the first move.

Room4talk knows what it means to move to another city, build a new life and make new friends. But we also know how hard it can be to meet new people when you’re out of your comfort zone. We’ve found the perfect balance between digital and real life. We help you to find your housemates online, but once you have found them, remember to switch off your phone! Then you can talk to your new friend face to face.

We’re digital but we value personal relationships, too. Communicating with people without your phone is easy! Plus, you will also improve your foreign language ;-)


Stefania.T